Is your heart tender? Or do you guard it well with lots of barriers to keep it from being hurt? Jesus had a tender heart. He was full of compassion and love for the crowds that gathered around Him. When He was grieving for His cousin John’s death, He did go to a desolate place alone to grieve, but when the crowds came, He did not send them away. He knew they were like sheep without a shepherd, hurting, broken, and yes, even hungry. His tender heart, sore from grieving John’s death, was still willing to care for others who needed His compassionate and healing hand. There was no guarding of His heart. He let it be tender and vulnerable, even to the point of allowing His own people to reject Him, spit on Him, hand Him over to be crucified. He felt it all and it must have been so very painful.
All of us, at one time or another, will face grief and sorrow in our lives. We will mourn and be sad, but we must not stay there. So often we want to make it so we never have to feel that kind of pain again, and we build walls in our heart to guard us from more hurt. But sadly we only end up isolating ourselves, as our hearts become hard and impenetrable. People around us who need our true, caring love don’t receive it because we don’t want to let them in all the way. We are guarding our hearts, not letting them be tender toward those who need our compassion. Fear controls us rather than letting Jesus love people through our tender, vulnerable hearts.
I am describing what happened to me. I was hurt by a trusted friend when only twelve years old. It hurt so badly, and I didn’t really know what to do with that hurt. Gradually I formed in my mind a way to keep from being hurt like that again. I would just not ever let myself get close to someone again. I would never share my inner feelings again. I figured people were not trustworthy, so I was not going to trust them again. By college age, I thought I would go into zoology to study and be around animals. They didn’t talk, so I could trust them. They couldn’t hurt my feelings. I married, had four children over the course of fifteen years, was part of a few different church bodies, and experienced joys and sorrows, as anyone would through all that, but my heart was not tender. I would not let it be. Most people I knew never saw me cry. My children never saw me cry. I did that only in private. Only when I could not keep it in any longer would my husband occasionally see me cry. But that has all changed as of this past week!
God has done a work in me. On the outside, I am still the same sixty-something, about to be a grandmother for the first time, ordinary, simple person, but on the inside, something is very different. It came about after feeling some hurt from people that I loved. I struggled in my mind with the feelings and thought I could just let them go, but the Holy Spirit in me wouldn’t let me do that. For three nights I wrestled with God in a way. Finally, on Wednesday I was free! I knew God had tenderized my heart, and I knew it would not be easy to start feeling again and being vulnerable, but thankfully He helped me want it. I wanted to feel as Jesus felt, even if it hurt badly, if it meant I could know Him better and love Him more. Now I think He can love others through me, because my heart is totally His and I trust Him with all I am. Oh, what a glorious thought!
Jesus did not run from the pain but faced it. He entrusted Himself to His Father’s will, Because He did trust the Father, He obeyed and went to the cross for us. He worked for all who would believe a great salvation. He is our Savior and our example. If you have been hurt and have dealt with the hurt by running away or trying to hide or kill the pain, I invite you to open your heart to the One who knows your pain and will tenderly hold your heart in His hands. That doesn’t mean you will not feel pain anymore, in fact, you will be more vulnerable to it, but you will be able to truly feel other people’s pain, and comfort them, and love them with Jesus’ everlasting, never failing love. What freedom and joy, even through the pain! Only faith in Jesus and His word make this a reality. Trust Him now with your whole heart. He will hold it tenderly.
